The choice we are faced with could be the difference in a life of heartache or a life of happiness. From the choices we make in the people we date, to the vocation we pursue, to the place we worship, to the individuals we surround ourselves with. What's more, everyday we make small decisions that will have bearing on the larger, the hard decisions in life. Who you surround yourself with often influences the people you date, and the person you make a marriage commitment comes out of that pool of people. I know so many girls that dated guys "for fun," never expecting to get involved, committed (and god forbid, pregnant), to men who did not stretch them to their full potential. Whoever said, "You can't help who you fall in love with," really needs to be slapped on the face. I say this only because I am the world's worst at following my emotions over my better judgement. I love the feeling of being in love, I love the magic of infatuation. This, coupled by the thought that someone else could hold the same infatuation for you? How could anything be more "right?" Yes, love is a beautiful thing in its time, with the right person, but still...someone slap me across the face. You are the only person that can control the decisions you make. Yes, emotions, feelings, hormones...those things do influence your "feelings," but it is your mind that decides whether the benefits outweigh the risks. We choose love. And often against all our greater judgement.
I think about this with bright friends and their motivation in school or work. So many times we neglect things which seem "insignificant" to where we eventually want to end-up because we do not see how our current job could determine how successful we will be at our dream. I have a friend. One of the brightest young men I have ever met. He was on a full-ride scholarship to the college I attended and at the head of his class. He was accepted early into medical school and looked forward to spending his last semester of college in a foreign country...no cost to him, his brainy scholarship was going to cover it. I had a class with him the semester before. A boring, blow-off, general education class that everyone had to take. He rarely came to class, and when he did...he'd doodle or pass me silly notes. I still don't know how he passed the tests. I came back after Christmas and was shocked to see my friend in the student union. Shouldn't he be off seeing the world, careless to the stresses of life? All his classmates were nervous they would not get an interview to medical school and here he was, already accepted? Come to find out, my friend had worked hard, taken all his required classes in his first three years of school, saved an entire year to breeze through. Sadly, he did not see how the last fifteen hours of gen eds were going to matter, so he blew them off. He dropped his GPA, he lost his scholarship. He was now forced to stay and retake classes that were far beneath his intellect, lose his romantic trip...all because he didn't see how these "tiny" choices would matter once he was a doctor.
The decisions, the choices made today could change our lives.
I just logged onto my school site to see that the nursing department has already enrolled me in the Desire to Learn classes I will be taking in the fall. It's not even June and already they are preparing me for the next two years which will greatly change the way the rest of my life plays out. I logged onto the site because summer school starts Wednesday. I'm not excited. I'm taking Algebra. I negotiated my way out of Algebra in my first degree...literally. It's the type of class I'd like to blow off...but once again, I am given a choice.
I've made quite a few bad choices in my life. Things I wish I could take back or relive. I've heard many people say they do not have any regrets about their lives, but it's always hard for me to swallow. Yes, I would like to live a life of no regrets, but to look back and see how such small decisions have affected my life...I'd love to go back with the wisdom I have today and relive those moments.
Starting this next chapter in my life, going to nursing school is a choice. It's a choice that honestly has come because I've made bad choices in the past. In my wildest dreams I never would have seen myself going to nursing school, but here I am. So many things have made me question this choice...but I know it is the right choice for me, right now. It's not the easiest. It's not where my heart or emotions are telling me to go. But I know it is the right place for me, right now.
See, there comes a time when those of us who have faith place our choices in the hands of God. Looking back, the times I wish I could take a decision back were always times where I was reacting out of what "Bre" wanted. I ignored the voice of God, of counselors, of my conscience because my emotions or comfort were speaking so loudly...or I didn't like what God was saying. Today I cannot tell you I'm thrilled about what He's saying. It will cost me. It will change me. It opens doors of uncertainty. It places the life I want to live on hold...
But I cannot be the person and live the life I want to be and have unless I go through the process. There's not a fast-forward button on the plan for our lives as much as we wish there was. Other people often bow out at this point because it makes them uncomfortable. Their relationships will fall apart, they will lose friends or significant others. It is at this point when true champions are born...red pill, blue pill? Truth or oblivion? The possibility of a better life, or the comfort of life as we know it?
Isaiah 30:21 reads, "And Thine ears shall hear a word behind thee saying, 'This is the way, walk ye in it, when you turn to the right hand or to the left."
God is always speaking to us. We always know the right answer. Many times it is the hard answer. But nonetheless, it is always there. God is always speaking. The question is whether the noise of the outside world is greater than the voice of God. Consider Mary. The Angel of the Lord appears to her on an ordinary day, in an ordinary time and tells her the most miraculous, outlandish news anyone could ever hear, "She (a virgin) will bear the promise of the Messiah." I think most of us, myself included, would not recognize the angel of the Lord, or Christ Himself if he walked into a room...we are too busy with what "we are doing." Hearing the voice of God, living in the perfect will for your life is a choice that must be made daily. And often times, hourly.
The trouble here lies in finding what is best, rather than what is simply acceptable. Yes, there are multiple roads I could choose for my life right now that would all be fine. I could still have a good life, make good money, and serve God's calling for my life through them...but they might not be best. God's plan for our lives is so much bigger than we give Him credit for. He wants to see us at our very best...which is something we ourselves cannot fathom. Peter F. Drucker says, "Start with what is right rather than what is acceptable."
I cannot tell you the times I have placed God on hold. "God, this plan sounds great, but I really want to take the summer off. I really want to date this guy who I know is not Your plan. I really want to do my own thing for a while." I come out of these times of serving myself, often feeling unworthy of the Master Plan for my life. I make another bad choice by choosing something mediocre and acceptable, rather than going back to the Master Plan.
I mean, God will say, "I told you so."
I screwed that up...again.
I don't deserve my calling anymore. That calling should go to someone more qualified. Someone who has lived a life worthy of it...
But this is where I am continually amazed. If you have followed my blogs or listened to me preach for any length of time you have heard me give this illustration. I heard it given by a comedian at a church I was attending and it rocked the way I viewed my life and my past choices: God's will, and calling for our lives is a lot like a GPS system. If you are trying to get somewhere with a GPS and it says turn left, and you go right, it does not give you a new destination. The GPS reroutes you back to your original point of arrival. Yes, the more wrong turns we get, the longer it will take to reach our destiny. (In the case of the Children of Israel it took forty years! YIKES!) But still...they were destined for the Promised Land, and we are destined for the plan mapped out for us before we were born. Remember Jeremiah 1:5, "Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you. I set you apart..."
But still...our destiny rises and falls on the choices we make today. I have made the choice to trust God on the next leg of my journey, to try my best not to get off course because that end destination is so beautiful. I still do not understand how I will ever reach it, how I could ever be worthy of my calling, but I owe it to myself to try.
We cannot sit around and wait for a wave of chance to sweep us away. Every choice you make (regardless of how insignificant) has an end result. It is choice--not chance--that determines your destiny.
Might we make choices today that will make the big choices easier. Might we chose a route that will take us to our destination without a million detours. You can start again. You can still end up where you are called to be. No one is too removed from God's plan to come back.
My father often tells the story of when I was born. I was my parent's first child and my father would often talk to my mother's stomach during her pregnancy. After delivery I was very upset to be out in the cold world. I wanted the earth to know I had arrived so I screamed believing they all could hear. My father looked at the doctor and said, "I want to try something." He approached the table where I was being examined and cleaned off and spoke these simple words, "Baby, this is your Daddy Speaking." Immediately I stopped crying, opening my eyes in wonder for the first time. The voice of our father brings peace. The voice of our Heavenly Father assures us that no matter how cold and hard our world seems, there is peace in knowing we are following our Father, that He is with us on this journey, regardless of how hard, and with Him we cannot fail.
Might we be so consumed with the voice and plan of the Master GPS that we know the voice of the Divine like a baby knows the voice of her daddy.
In the end the choice is yours...choose wisely.
No comments:
Post a Comment